Mario 64 DS Boss Text
Goomboss Speech
Yoshi
Bwa ha ha! I'm no ordinary goomba! I am Goomboss, the great Goomba, the grand pooh-bah Goomba. That Mario always stomps on us. But now the tables have turned! I locked him up in a room. I bet he's crying like a baby. I have no business with you, so scram! There's no way a prehistoric wimp like you could beat my stupendous stomps!
How did that just happen? Is it just the Goomba's fate to lose? I have Mario locked up in a room you know. This key will open the door to his room! I still can't believe you beat me.
Mario
You're Mario!!! What are you doing here?! My underlings locked you up in that room. Never mind. I'll deal with you myself! Now I will trample you as you have trampled us!
I am so full of energy! I have been beaten again?! Is this out destiny?! To be trampleed by oppressive feet for all eternity? No, we will triumph next time! Yes, next time! The Goombas fate is not defeat, but perseverance!
Luigi
Whaa?! You're... Ma-Mari...
...
Huh?
Ooh, you're just that Luigi fellow. I confuse you with Mario. Your mustaches look so similar. Pshaw! I'll deal with you specially. Now bring it on!
This is unbelievable. I...lost to that pip-squeak Luigi! This must be some kind of mistake! I'll keep my guard up next time we battle. Just you wait...
Wario
I have my sights set on Mario. You're hardly even worth the energy it would take to trample you. But I do so love to stomp on those who have spent all eternity stomping my clan. And since you've come all this way... Bring it on!
I can't believe you just beat me like that... N-not too shabby. I figured you were a fighter with that mean mustache. I'll battle you again when I have free time. You should thank your lucky stars that I've got such a packed schedule.
King Boo
Mario
Eee hee hee... I am Big Boo, the spookiest of all the spirits. I love scaring wimpy humans. Eee hee hee... You'll never sneak behind me!
Eee hee hee! You can never really kill a ghost! We always come back! See you again. Eee hee hee!
Luigi
Eee hee hee! I am Big Boo, the ghastliest of all ghosts. What the...? I thought I locked you up... Well, never mind. Now I'll really creep you out! You can't escape... Eee hee hee!
Eee hee hee! We ghosts always rise from the dead. I just love the the look of terror on your face. In fact, I live for it! Eee hee hee!
See you soon!
Wario
Eee hee hee! I am Big Boo, the ghastliest of the spirits. Eek! What's this?! Your face... It would even scare a ghost. How horrible! You've got it on backwards... I do the scaring around here! Alright, now I'll put some real fear in that frightening face of yours!
Augh! The scariest one wins, and your face is flesh-creepingly frightening. Good thing I don't have any flesh! Eee hee hee! This is not the end. See you again.
Yoshi
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Eee hee hee!
Chief Chilly
Luigi
You there with a mustache! I am the king of cold, Chief Chilly. I lock up anyone who challenges the supremity of my 'stache. In fact, I locked up one such fellow just the other day. Hmm. What a sad mangy mustache you've got there. It hardly seems worth it to destroy you. With a 'stache lie that, you're clearly the sidekick, not the star. But I'm between meetings now, so I might as well. In the battle for the best mustache, I'll win hairs down. Ha ha ha!
Bring it on peach fuzz!
No way! I lost to such a scrawny guy like that...? Hmmm did I not grow my mustache well enough? I must hurry and condition it... Farewell!
Mario
You there with the mustache! I am the king of cold, Chief Chilly. I lock up anyone who challenges the greatness of my mustache. I am the mustache master! In fact, I locked up a rude fellow just the other day. Hmph!! The nerve of him, coming to my realm looking like that. Your mustache is not altogether bad. Not as good as mine of course. But what insolence trying to show me up! I shall shave that fuzz right off your face! Here I come!
Dang!! There's someone with a greater mustache than mine? Ridiculous! Does this mean you're cooler than me too? You might be gifted facially, but you better watch out once I got my mustache styled.
Wario
You there with the mustache! I am the king of cold, Chief Chilly. I imprison those who challenge the greatness of my mustache. In fact, I locked a man up just the other... What's this? You look just like the impertinent mustached man I locked up the other day. Has everyone been taking mustache grower? There's only one way to settle this once and for all.
We'll battle man to man to see who has the best mustache! Let's rumble!
Oh noooo! I lost! Augh! My mustache... My pride and joy, my reason for living! Now I suppose I'll have to explore new pursuits.
Yoshi
Hmm? I see you have no mustache. Poor, bald, little creature. It's not a fair fight for you, but luckily, I'm not a fair fighter. Let's go!
I simply cannot believe I lost to a hairless pip-squeak like you! My mustache was my only joy. Now what am I going to do?